Narcissistic Marriage

Let's settle this misunderstanding once and for all, because scripture is misused and is keeping so many people in bondage with an abuser...

If 2 people get married, and they are non-believers, know that the marriage was never ordained by God. 

What, then, drew you together? Your childhood wounds and Bondages.

When we encounter God within this marriage - the man then can lead his whole family to Godliness. It's Gods will for every man to be the head, and to step up in his role, but walking hand in hand with the Lord. Spending time in the Lords presence, getting healed and delivered, and taking instruction from God. Contrary to popular belief, God is EAGER for a relationship. He wants to communicate with you, and receive His instruction to best Minister to your family. This is an ideal situation, but most men are not stepping into their role. They are stubborn and prideful and refuse to bow down to Jesus. 

If it's the woman who encounters God, and not the husband, things are very different. She realizes that she's been living a life of sin. She's been operating under all kinds of spirits and curses. God helps her to see truth. He helps her alleviate some of her pain, He delivers her from her demons. But... She stays. She believes it's her job to change her husband, and to lead him to Christ. She believes it's her godly duty to share with her husband everything the Lord has shown her. She ends up getting mocked, and bullied. She's left in fear of leaving, because God hates divorce, and she's left in fear within the marriage because she now sees the abuse for what it is. The closer she gets to God the more her husband's demons manifest. Things get worse, not better, because they are now unequally yoked. 

God DIDN'T ordained the marriage. He didn't draw the 2 of you together. It was trauma, and the demons that are legally allowed into your life because of generational curses, womb trauma, abuse, neglect, emotional wounding, trauma bonds, Stockholm syndrome, etc. These are not from God, either. We blame God for all our afflictions until we learn the truth. He wasn't part of it. He was waiting for you to reach out to Him. He was anxiously waiting for your pain to reach a point where you questioned why life was so hard. Instead... We learn to live with our pain and affliction, we develop resilience that tolerates all kinds of torture, and accepts all kinds of behaviour and sin. We are spiritually dead, our conscience seared, and we need JESUS to revive us and to begin our healing and deliverance journey. Salvation is just step 1.

As a woman, you need to pray. Ask God for steps. Ask God for guidance. He will reveal to you the steps to take. He will create a way where there was no way.  Have faith in Him, He will work all things out for your good. This means He will bring you truth, clarity, wisdom. He doesn't want you to finally find Jesus, only to remain inside a life of suffering. 

The aim is to get you out of all agreements and covenants that you've made with the devil. This might look like Him leading you to a place of safety, or to get a restraining order, or for you to go to a safe house... It depends on where you are, and what He feels is best for you. This is when you pray fervently for the steps to take. This is also a time for you, as an oppressed person, to realize that God will work WITH you, and in favor of you, to get you into safety, and for justice to play out. This is Gods will for the oppressed. 

I know that this is really hard, especially for those who have never walked a spiritual walk. For the brand new believers. It's a LOT to take in all at once, and it's not easy. It hurts. It's impossible to get others to believe you. It's impossible to muster the right words. Until you're led to research Narcissistic relationships, and coercive control, and domestic violence, and gaslighting, and all the lingo that starts explaining the craziness. There's always a little bit of relief knowing that you're not alone. That others have been in it and through it. Even people who are asleep in their spiritual life. Having God on your side is the better option to walk in Freedom, because He knows exactly what spirits are holding you captive. He can give you the root causes, and He can relieve you of your demons, strongholds, situations, covenants, etc. 

This is why your walk with God is not sunshine and rainbows. It's hard work. It's war. It's battles and putting on the Armour and praying and suffering and crying and emotions and turmoil as we learn and grow.  This is why we cannot judge others, we have no idea how deep their warfare goes. 

This is also why we need to remember something that is widely misunderstood... God hates divorce, yes. He'd much rather have the husband repent and turn towards Him so He can deliver him from all his addictions and He can show him where he's gone wrong and He can guide him towards living righteously - together with his family. 

But... Men are not turning towards God. 

This is leaving women and children scared and afraid and alone. 

If this is you, please trust in God. Don't turn elsewhere... Don't try to "find yourself" by going on retreats and start seeking spiritual practices like yoga and meditation. Please don't turn towards your own inner healing. You're opening more doors! You're headed the wrong way. 

Jesus is the ONLY WAY. 

Gods way is perfect, because He clears up all your spiritual warfare that's creating all the consequences of unhealed traumas and past sins. ONLY GOD CAN DO THIS. Not the universe. Not any goddess. Our creator. The living God. I pray that this has helped someone. I pray that you realize JESUS IS THE ONLY WAY. But this isnt Sunday school. This is war. It's a war between good and evil. 

God... Is... Good! 

Pray the Psalms 91 prayer over yourself and your children. 


Identifying if you are in a narcissistic marriage:

https://www.youtube.com/live/rDc0nIybo4k?si=6hRWZtrRlsYvmx8D

Is it worth your soul?

https://youtu.be/bytkr_qjgxM?si=R_-DtMR9JGh2VCd9

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